Cathy Cress M.S.W.

Mom Loves You Best

Gen X Parents Can Veer Away From Sibling Rivalry

favoritism , one of the loudest alarm bells for sibling rivalry

Posted Aug 25, 2011

How can Gen X parents avoid  sibling rivalry  with their kids? Make every child your favorite.

Parents need to be impartial in every way, although this is a very difficult skill to learn with children. It is inevitable that moms and dads will feel differently about offspring who have varying needs, dispositions, and places in the family.

But favoritism is one of the loudest alarm bells that lead to jealousy, sibling wounds, and sibling rivalry. Sibling"I Hate You" stories are formed like hurricane Irene-stalking up the east coast this week. They start small, gather size and speed then wreak havoc between siblings for decades. So parents have to practice being fair and impartial with kids, every day, even though it is so difficult.

Find a reason to tell each child he or she is special-my first, my boy, my daughter, my youngest-but spread the love equally. Having favorites creates giant "I Hate You" stories. If you praise one child, make a conscious effort to praise all the rest.

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