Hard to believe, but someone here is seriously suggesting that you treat your most intimate relationship like the hard nosed, self interested, and bitter politicking that goes on between nation states. This is so absolutely absurd. The alliances between nations is not based on trust. They mean nothing. When nation states cooperate it is usually to attack someone else. She says you may be avoiding the core issues in you relationship this way. She got that bit right. Shame she doesn't have a clue what they are, or where you go from there. What a pathetic excuse for psychology.