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If that comment on a lack of diagnosis is aimed at me, it's only unconfirmed because despite having many different professionals say they think that I fit the criterea, (Psychotherapist who has known me 15 years, a Psychologist, someone who worked many years with people with BPD, a social worker and a few crisis workers) the reason I remain undiagnosed is because there is lack of funding. Both for the assessment period which would take a minimum of 6 weeks and likely longer, but for the treatment that followed it (2 years intensive treatment then outpatient/follow up treatment). It is not because there isn't a likihood of a diagnosis, an assessment has been requested at least 9 times over the past 5 years alone on my last count, the person/s refusing them are literally in charge of the funding and purse strings and I am one of many who like me remain undiagnosed and many of those are far more severe than me- some end up killing themselves. This is what happens when you have a capitalist government trying to destroy a socialist philosophy (the NHS) by simply starving it of the funds needed to treat everyone needing treatment. Thus treatment is only offered now if you are life and death, and is very minimal. If you need longer term help it's not available.
But that's aside from my point.
My point-and the post it seems as though you are replying to; was because I do not believe this article reports in a responsible and healthy way both the complexity and variety of symptoms one with BPD suffers with. Some for example will turn everything inwards rather than outwards. Others for example, will avoid and bypass any intense interaction because it feels too difficult to tolerate and can't cope with the emotional turmoil, some don't shout back if they suspect cheating or their low self esteem and emotional radar for anyone leaving them, they simply fold into themselves and become very depleted and sad and take things out on themselves....
I could go on. The point I am trying to make is that BPD comes in many forms and additionally to that covers a wide spectrum of how intensely something affects a person and how well versed you are in either acting appropriately or being able to feel unhappy but not act out (or inwards) with it. That the article helped explain your wife- that's great! Really, I'm pleased for you. But remember for every headline type BPD candidate this article applies for, there are many others who it does not. And if everyone took the same mindset you need to take with your girlfriend in order to prevent a fall out or for an easy life, you'd not only be walking on egg-shells you didn't need to be walking on, but you'd be doing them a disservice and not giving their level of ability, competence and tolerance over their own emotions the credit it may well deserve.
What I will also add is- incase you were not aware, BPD has had a lot of bad press, in fact way more bad press than it has good press. It has gotten to the point where as a result of rumours rather than experiences, people form judgements and therapists and psychologists and other professionals will refuse to work with a client before even meeting them just because they carry this diagnosis. Spin that out to people being refused for work before they have even attended an interview despite having spotless referees and previous experience or friends they held close reading about the bad press and keeping their distance...something really needs to change. And it seems some times that it is, but if it is, it will take a very long time to correct bad for good, regain trust from both parties and stop the stereotypes.
What I feel here with this article is that it is both brooding on the very dated and bad press type stereotype and risking those who are at a loss as to how to struggle with their lives already who now will have to take on others fear and assumptions and at times without good reason (as explained above) and it does no one any good, it can also, cause sufferers to feel even more ashamed, even less likely to ask for help and even more likely to attempt suicide as a result.
Hence describing this article as both wrong and irresponsible, and unless they've had their head in a bucket for the past 20 years (and I am starting to wonder...), the writer of this article should know better
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