What to know about what you don’t know you know. #1: Intuition is very efficient—if you don't overthink it.
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Although I agree with the author's observation that Mirroring is the key to a child growing up feeling confident and secure in himself , parents are not born with a Parenting 101 guide implanted in their DNA. Parents, for the most part, try their best ,but are often victims of their own parents,who yelled at them as kids or worse.
Parents often have a wounded or frustrated inner child within themselves inherited from their own upbringing which manifests itself under the duress of parenting. Sometimes even they can be surprised at their own anger and feel shame about it . But the old adage " it takes a village to raise a child" applies to so many modern family circumstances and is ever so pertinent in the case of this article. Parents feel alone in parenting in many cases without extended family for support relying often on social workers which only serve to disempower and shame the parent into conforming to stringent parenting methods ( with the exception of severe cases of family abuse).
The "research " link the author posted above at the start of the article put the results of the research as far more tolerant of parental mistakes in determining outcomes for kids than the author alludes to. Most parents are guilty of megaphone parenting but as the results of the Lehigh University research states: "Caregivers need only 'get it right' 50 percent of the time when responding to babies' need for attachment to have a positive impact on a baby, new research finds." Which means there is room for mistakes. Where relevant ,let's move beyond 1950's Winnicott ideology and have empathy for both parent and child, treating the family holistically, as a unit and not always as the abuser and the victim.
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