What to know about what you don’t know you know. #1: Intuition is very efficient—if you don't overthink it.
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My childhood was a warzone, conflicted by the over zealous joy I was to feel it wasn't physically abusive, and that I had 2 parents. My younger brother was recruited in bullying me after being conditioned with rewards for learning how to do it I recall as early as still in diapers. The fights were used to try to manipulate and hurt, or renegotiate and reconcile, or manipulate into being present in the home, with my alcoholic Veteran Father "Who Had This Drill Sgt. In the Army". Father would use alcohol as his fuse for binging and purging his sins of war and justify absence, threats of absence, inconsistency, violent persecutorial mood swings. I feel I can relate with many of the comments in an after the article.
Since being diagnosed with PTSD. The abuse became physical! To show me for seeking help? and have been shunned by the whole larger, close extended family some in law enforcement ( one who is a child abuse detective, I grew up with promising we'd never drink or smoke like our parents), law enforcement who have effectively protected him from any repercussions and have at all costs refused any help, even going as far as to have me arrested and my report and incident photos lost after he repeatedly punched me in the face after instigating an argument I effectually never raised a finger towards him during except to try to protect my face. Going No COntact was one of the most difficult decisions and potentially healing of my life; when I was on antidepressants, not ending my life was ( yes because of the chemical reaction to them). My Brother is still a narcissist and the Golden Child. Even after Drug Dealing, Lying manipulating for financial gain for years at cost to promised help to me for college, a clear history of using personal contacts to lie, steal, manipulate, defame, use others... All he had to do was cry and apologize, like I used to be humiliated and intimidated into doing.... for his acts of verbal, physical violence against me, or my anguish at neglect, or for whatever they've done. Oh yeah and he and pretends he found Jesus.
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